Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Methinks the Smurf doth Protest too Much

So I finally found one of these causes that I felt I could get behind.

It's called "Invisible Children." We did what they call a "night commute," which means we all sleep at this elementary school. When we wake up in the morning, we are still where we were when we went to sleep, which was surprising and disappointing, because I couldn't figure out which part made it a "commute," but the whole point was protesting Ugandan children anyway, so at least we got that accomplished. No more Ugandan children! Ever!

What made the protest a particularly foolish idea for me this time was that I ate at Chili's beforehand, and I got food poisoning WAY bad. I was sleeping there in the bark box, running every hour or so to the line of port-o-potties in this mad dash, and then once I made it, diarrhea was shooting out of me like a hose with your thumb over the nozzle. My stomach felt like there were cavemen in it smashing stones together to get fire out of them. After a few trips, I was also vomiting. Oh, man, did I ever vomit all over the inside of this one Johnny-on-the-Spot. I feel bad for whoever went in there next, especially if they were in as much of a hurry as I had been, and they end up sitting in that.

Morning's light revealed that one of my own little personal "night commutes" resulted in my glasses getting trampled underfoot. So, blind, battered, and barfy, I huddled with the masses for the photograph, then ran again for the toilet.

Now here's the part that showed how delirious I must have been--every time I woke up frozen and achy and sick, I would think, "No! Ugandan children don't get to just pack up and go home when they are sick! And neither will I!"

Well, I made it all night. Yes, I did. And was so sick that I spent the next thirty-one hours in bed, and the next day after that still extra sick (I didn't even get to protest Panda Express or Mexicans having to work jobs or any of the other protests planned for that day--gulp!). But I made it. Did my night commute, yessir. And those little starving Ugandan Brats better be grateful, that's all I can say.