Friday, June 23, 2006

Temple Pageant

Well, since I already just wrote all this out in an e-mail, I figured it would be much easier to just copy and paste it. Which is why I'm still not telling you about the eggs and the balloons. Maybe next time.

Okay, so the Manti Pageant. I have to say that I totally expected it to be dumb, mostly because of the way that everybody kept telling me how dumb it was except for the people who kept telling me how great it was, which were mostly dumb people. So I went into it expecting crap. I was therefore at least pleasantly surprised by the special effects, like the pillar of light and all the fireballs and things. Pinetree really hated it. He couldn't stand how melodramatic it was. I think he thought a pageant is more of a play than "2 : SHOW, EXHIBITION; especially : an elaborate colorful exhibition or spectacle often with music that consists of a series of tableaux." I have to admit that the tableaux were pretty unsettling. I didn't like how there were tons and tons of Joseph Smiths running around doing different things at the same time. The narrators had an impressive vocabulary. Jesus appeared to the Nephites directly behind a lighting tower, which I had predicted. Pinetree thinks it was a sign. The worst thing was the way that everybody moved their arms when they talked. Well, actually the real worst thing was this DORK that we took with us who got up in the middle and went to sit somewhere else so he "could feel the spirit." I guess he was annoyed by some of the comments that Pinetree was making. Pinetree later apologized, but I didn't think that was necessary, because his comments didn't keep me from feeling the spirit. When it was over Pinetree said that he didn't like all the patriotic themes running through it (I'm not sure whether the scene in which Brigham young sees Captain Moroni, several of the founding fathers, and some strange Indian who all tell him about the greatness of America is based on a real event, but either way it was heavy handed and seemed to promote the war in Iraq). And then this kid was all, "Well, if you'd ever read the Book of Mormon you would know that it's all about patriotism and America." And Pinetree probably wanted to punch him but he didn't. And then the kid said all these rude things to me and then he just disappeared. And then when I got home there were like a million (okay three) texts from him on my phone continuing the argument, which I thought was extra dumb. Anyway, I actually liked the pageant, I'll admit it, although I'm still trying to figure out whether I liked it as some sort of knee-jerk devil's advocate reaction to all the naysayers or whether I really was whelmed by the small-town charm and rustic coming-together appeal of the whole thing. I could tell that these people were really putting their hearts into this thing. Part of me was thinking, "Man, it would be fun to do this with my kids some day," and the rest was just terrified of all the Angel Moronis running around beforehand in drag-queen makeup asking us if we wanted to refer someone to the missionaries and interrupting our game of Apples to Apples, which I won by a lot.

12 comments:

blueshorts said...

Dude, just use my screen name,or my real name. I'm a big boy, I can handle any repercussions. I was the DORK "who got up in the middle and went to sit somewhere else so he "could feel the spirit.""
Although you misquoted me, I'm not going to argue anything about it here. I do apologize for speaking in haste.
I don't know what "all these rude things" are that I said to you. After that initial conversation the last thing I recall discussing was the little drummer that was following the Army officer around, during which conversation I felt as though you were trying to catch me in some philological fallacy, so I just decided to shut up before you ripped me to shreds.
As we progressed towards the cars I went to use the restroom. When I got out your group had already disappeared.

Wiggle said...

At first I didn’t know who the "Dork" was but now I do. Crazy.
I Think we should all be super dramatic and talk with are arms and exaggerate our facial expressions. Just like the people in the pageant.

Oh and good job at Apples to Apples.

вџн said...

You being drama queen or was it really that bad?

el veneno said...

If you do decide to do something like that with your kids someday please please do the Hill Cumorah Pageant in New York. My family somehow got roped into being in that pageant a couple times when I was a kid and it was marvelous. Manti is polygamous and creepy (except the castle of a temple), Palmyra is amazing, the special effects are better, the story is linear, and all the guys in the pageant are either nephites wearing skirts or lamanites wearing speedos and loin cloths.

Samantha said...

Sorry, have to agree with El V., although I missed the Lamanites in the speedos/loincloths when I saw it. I feel cheated.

The Drama Queen said...

Yeah, I was not being a drama queen, buh. I was actually trying to put a positive spin on it, since we invested so much time. You would especially hate it, buh. Never go. Never.

Muse said...

Smurf? Will you come look at my poem? I like it. And I want you to read it. pleease? :)

Boston Jon said...

WHEN you move to Boston, we will take a little road trip to the Hill Cumorah pageant and I will let you make any comments you like. In fact, I'll make some too. It fascinates me how some people can't feel the spirit in the presence of people who think about what they see. Because, well, I worship an infintitely wise God, who, presumably, respects thought. Makes me wonder what Spirit they are trying to feel.

Boston Jon said...

I freely admit that in my last post about an infinitely wise God, I made some typos. All I can say is I also believe in a forgiving one, who perhaps has an ironic sense of humor.

Mustard said...

I wonder if people who came to see the Oakland Temple Pageant also felt the way you did about Manti? But as a participant for many years I can tell you it was awesome to be a part of the play.

blueshorts said...

Although I can be naively narrow minded at times, I'm generally pretty tolerant of people expressing their opinions about things. However, the comments made at the pageant were not thoughtful critiques of substance, they were more along the lines of stupid, purposely offensive, loud sarcasm; for which my tolerance that night grew thin.
I like Wiggles idea. Obviously I've already got the drama down, now I just need to flail my arms, and exaggerate my facial expressions.

AttemptingthePath said...

i agree with samantha and el v. the hill cumorah pageant is much better.