Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Global Renovation and Gropiation

I found a paper the other day from when I was in first grade. The assignment was to draw a picture of what our perfect bedroom would look like. Mine was all full of balloons and it had a flag from every country in the world. It also had my mom standing over my bed saying, "I owe yuo ten dollars!" The funny thing (besides what a little geography nerd I was) was that the eight or so flags I had drawn in pencil and crayon were remarkably accurate. I had Suriname, Botswana, and Senegal, among others. I thought that was great, seriously.

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Anyway, Wiggle, Pinetree, The Ring Bearer and I stayed up all night the other night and talked about this globe at Vermillion Skies. It was such a funny geography conversation. I had posed the question, "If you had to eliminate one country from the face of the planet, which would it be and why?" We went on for hours debating the pros and cons (from our limited vantage) of each country. I am still not sure I understand why the Ring Bearer was defending China so vehemently, but they did invent pasta, the compass, and gunpowder, right?

Anyway, I think it's a huge blessing that I've found these friends who can get all passionate about the same things that I've always loved. Maybe some day I will get a flag of every country for my room. Starting with Tajikistan. It's like a connect-the-dots! look:

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I really think that one is cool.

Anyway, I voted to get rid of the Philippines. I don't know why, but that country just seems kinda dirty to me. And it's weird that it's just an archipelago. No mainland. And the idea of the Philippines conjures up images of rats in my brain, and those darn Portuguese letting the dogs loose on the dodo birds. I know that was in Mauritius, and it was Spain that colonized the Philippines, but still, there is correlation in my brain. Also, didn't the Filipinos eat Magellan? I'm pretty sure I heard that.

Man, it's always good to have a great light-hearted discussion about mass-destruction and genocide at your nearest decafe at ungodly hours of the morning.

The next night I whomped on my friends at Scrabble, also at Vermillion Skies. I have begun to know half of the people there every time we go in. We invented the intransitive verb "gropiate." Words are always coined during such late-night Scrabble battles. I invented a system of rating one's rack of letters based on playability. If your letters look like this (as Pinetrees did at one point during the night): AEIIIUU, you have Irritable Vowel Syndrome. If you have this one: GJKQTTV, you are consonantpated.

There was a couple gropiating in their car the whole time we were there. When we left Ronnie told them that they got an "A" for stamina. Then we went to Beto's, which called upon its right to refuse us service. I swear the rest of this story is on Ronnie's blog, so you should go there and see it. Imade a series of funny phone calls to their customer comment line. Ooh, and I just realized I have leftover yummy burritos in the fridge, so I'm going to cut this short. Not that it was going in any direction anyway, huh?

I just want to say that Vermillion Skies is a beautiful place, but don't go there because there are too many people like you there already. Unless you bring me with you. Then you're invited. Bye.


pinetree said...

I think it would be awesome if you got a flag of every nation for your room. That sort of thing always makes me feel more globally connected, aware, and empowered. Even when I'm not.
Does Beto's have a right to deny us service?
The sign says it's open 24 hours a day, so even if they can't give us food, they should at least let us eat our Del Taco in there. If Beto's had a customer service line, someone would be getting an earful.
Dude, you are a huge blessing in our lives too. I've told you this and you know it.
This doesn't change the fact that next time we play scrabble, I'm not going to have Irritable Vowel Syndrom, and will not hesitate to kick your trash. Later.

eleka nahmen said...

I miss out on everything these days. Hmph. I haven't even met Jaron yet!!!

The Ring Bearer said...

I still stand by my proposed destruction of India. Look at it! It's trying to crawl into China as it is. I have to defend my precious China. It looks like God just had a piece of Earth left, and so he played "pin India on the planet", and just kinda rammed it up into its current position.

I also still think we should core Australia and make a great big circumference out of it. We could drown all of those nasty animals there (which actually includes the vast majority of Australians too). The "outback" could be a giant, shallow, freshwater lake. Heck, even I would visit if it were like that.

Oh, and one last thing. I think if you are going to decorate your room with flags from every country, you should make some hang like giant silk curtains - like in Hero (The Palace). That would be SO cool!

Christmas Smurf said...

Oh, MAN. I love you guys.

BamaBeau said...

Isn't there a flag place across near your work? I bet if you were to buy like 5-10 little ones each payday, you could totally do it.

B'Link Andumizem said...

Interesting how selective your memory was that night. I was fully there and in the flesh... yet you failed to mention my presence?

Well the initial sting is passed and gone, but still did ya leave me out because I didn't want to kill any countries? I had a grand time and even enjoyed the walk home. Perhaps I wasn't mentioned becasue I left after the genocide conversation.

I still love ya and wanted to say thanks for stopping by the other night to see how I was doing.

Anonymous said...

India - The largest democracy in the world.
-secular and democratic, and allows missionary activity (as compared to China).
-Land of most beautiful women (Aishwrya Rai)

Thats my two cents as learnt in Geography 120.

Also who doesnt love the Bombay House........

The Ring Bearer said...

Nony, were you trying to convince me to leave India alone? If you were, you're going about it entirely the wrong way. But if it's alright with you, I'd like to keep your 2 cents anyway... (I actually already spent it).

Betrayed. said...

India - AIDS capital of the world.
-filthy and poverty stricken, over populated without enough living accommodations
-land of the monkey's paw
I don't love the Bombay House

Christmas Smurf said...

Okay, b'link andumizem, I didn't forget you were there. It's just that you weren't really a part of the conversation other than just shaking your head and reminding us that we were flippantly discussing genocide while you crocheted your blanket.